HOW TO BECOME A BETTER LOVER – MYTHS (EMOTIONS)
The myth that men should not have or express emotions, such as tenderness, crying, and touching, or the myth that a man should be ‘performance oriented’ in sex. This myth encourages men to believe that a man’s performance in sex is all important as, through his prowess, he ‘gives’ the woman an orgasm. It encourages the belief that it is a man’s responsibility to initiate sex, to arouse the woman, to lead her to her orgasm and then to have his orgasm.
Other myths are equally destructive to a relationship. One of these is that women expect men to have a large penis which, when erect, is ‘as hard as steel’, and that sex can only take place if a man has an erection. This myth has led to the concern of men who have erectile impotence and to the development of ‘implants’ in the penis to make it erect (see Chapter 10). Sex can be enjoyable without a steel-hard erection although it is enjoyable when a man has one. The star in the performance is not the man’s penis but the man – and the woman. Sex is more than just genital contact. Good sex includes exploring all parts of the body which a person perceives as erotically stimulating.
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